TWO out of THREE LAPS DONE – 24 weeks down, My Exciting Perinatal journey

If I hadn\’t had a chance to shout it to the rooftops, or if you have not heard yet, I am pregnant, expectant, with a child. lol.

The perinatal journey has been interesting, to say the least. Quite a lot of ups and downs. I will be fully honest with every part of the experience.

I have always had the writing bug so when it came to journaling my pregnancy experience it wasn\’t hard.

I am on the 24th week by the time I am writing this, it has been a journey and a half.

But let\’s go through my first trimester and the two things I noted;

1. Morning sickness– Morning sickness is a lie, it wasn\’t at all morning sickness, but rather a whole day and night sickness. As long as I was awake I was not feeling well. Tips to counter act the morning sickness weren\’t very helpful but I realized continued hydration did keep me from actually throwing up and reduced the nausea symptoms. Every other remedy didn\’t work for me, and that was my observation. Also, I found it rather unhelpful that the sympathy people have for your first trimester is just more of a comparative mocking. I don\’t know whether the hormones had a larger place to play with why I took it personal, but for future reference, comparing someone\’s experience to something worse is the least helpful form of assistance for a cranky exhausted mother to be.
2. Exhaustion and its role on my Mental health– I am an extremely active bunny. I wake up early and yes, I am the type of people who are up and ready as soon as their feet hit the floor. My first stint pregnant I had so much energy all through my pregnancy, but that was almost seven years ago. This time round was different, I found myself extremely tired and unmotivated for the first trimester (4 months for me). It felt unending, I was way more irritable because all my coping skills were far out of my reach. I struggled with productivity and I also struggled getting help. ( I am learning slowly how to make space for the people in my life to help me). I also got emotional over very minute things and it was sooner that I realized that hormonal or not I had to get a handle on it. I found coping tools that were less active because my Mental Health was beginning to be at stake here.

Here are the coping tools I came up with during my perinatal journey, some I began incorporating in the second trimester because the first was a little tougher. So far I am a favourite of the second trimester. I am growing at an extravagant rate but I have my wits, my energy and my vitality and with that, I feel way more blessed now.

1. Morning meditation plus shower first thing in the morning

I have learned this very amazing tip, I take a shower first thing in the morning ( I end up taking two showers a day anyway) whether I have been active or not. If I run the shower warm, I run it cold for the last few minutes of the shower, guaranteed to get you up. Also very refreshing because pregnancy is a complete hormonal mess.

2. Yoga , hip-hop tabata band long walks

I developed some pelvic pain over the last two weeks and having Yoga has managed my pain incredibly. I also took a Pilates course for the perinatal period and I use simple gentle poses to keep my body limber and moving. Yoga has been very beneficial. I was already doing the hip hop Tabata before I got pregnant, I cannot speak of how safe it is for any other pregnant woman, but I love being able to carry my own weight.

Also my six-year-old thinks I look hilarious doing home workouts so I get about 30 minutes of laughter. Once in the week, I do run up some sweat from my home workouts …. here is a link to the channel I use. My husband doesn\’t enjoy long walks but he enjoys running the same distance, I can never get that, but every so often I take walks, the blood flowing from yoga, walking, and light exercising has also helped me keep a clear head.

3. Journaling and keeping track of stuff ( workouts, rest, symptoms, weeks, food etc)

I pat myself every time I move intentionally, I also keep track of what I am eating to ensure I am eating enough. Unlike most pregnancy rumors, I haven\’t had a hearty appetite the first trimester was because I was nauseated but now I have no reason for it. Especially when I am alone and not looking after my family, I can get carried away and forget to eat. I know how nutrition is important for my growing baby so I have had to be intentional with food.

4. Only allowing great energy into your space.

I had a more difficult first trimester because I wasn\’t watching out for myself. I had my wedding, several impromptu functions, and a funeral. I was not being as aware and as careful with my space and who I let into it. I also took a road trip to the funeral about 500km and that wasn\’t as intelligent especially considering the state my body was in. Recently I have been very intentional in creating spaces that work for me, creating boundaries and saying no because self-care is a necessity. My mental health has been great, I space out my therapy appointments so I can give my clients a revitalized version of myself, especially when pregnant, that extra effort is necessary for my belief.

5. Giving yourself room to have fun and do so guiltless

I refuse to be a boring pregnant lady sleeping and snoring through the day. All mad at life. Now I know some people have a difficult time through their pregnancy, I was so fortunate that my second trimester was more upbeat but even during the later part of my first trimester I refused to be defined. every time I found an opportunity to do something I found fun, I did. I looked for more reasons to laugh, I found ways to laugh at myself. I pledged to enjoy my experience.

6. Learning to accept help from your people\’s

Hardest lesson ever. I am such a type A. I like the way I do things and I like them done that way. So even in my first trimester, I noticed I would push through pain and discomfort just to ensure everything was done. First, I had to learn to accept help without guilt because also, having a partner who does things for you without making you feel indebted is great. Also, I had to learn to allow imperfection into my home and work. If I didn\’t have the energy to do something then it is okay if it has to wait. It is okay to order out because I am too exhausted to cook a meal. It is fine to just rest even when I haven\’t checked everything off my list. Otherwise, I found myself not enjoying activities that were rather joy-inducing.

7. Listening to peoples experiences but sieving out because yours is still pretty unique

Like I said, There was probably only one of my friends who told me that the first trimester was hard, it may get harder but it\’s all good. she never compared it to her experience in an effort to diminish mine. But everyone else was on the extra, you should thank God it\’s not as bad as so and so or mine was so bad I would do anything for your experience. One, I have realized each pregnancy is unique.

My own first pregnancy was nothing like this one, I literally breezed through the whole nine months, how fun. No morning sickness, no loss of energy, my belly was barely showing, and yet I gave birth to a healthy 3.2-kilo baby boy with very short labour. This experience, same body, same uterus but very different experience, you would think it would be easier but no this one was like I was re-learning everything again, And this is okay because our experiences will be different, it doesn\’t diminish anyone else\’s experience, and it doesn\’t take away from another different one. So I am open to listening but I also know that I am fully equipped for this experience, and I can handle what comes my way without worrying about the horror stories.

8. Focus on positive thoughts only.

I have been postponing any negative anxious thought processes because I don\’t have any extra ounce of energy left. In DBT ( a behavioural therapy technique ) it is taught to distract yourself for the short term on negative emotions. Most of them dissipate as soon as they are ignored and finally forgotten and the others are in a proverbial box until it\’s safe enough to process.

9. Rest and sleep … I am mad sleepy especially the last few weeks I am taking my naps and enjoying the long-ass night of sleep again without guilt. I schedule my life around rest. I am creating a whole new life and as such, we can be sure it takes a toll on my body.

Have fun during your perinatal journey and seek to adventure on your own even as you listen to sound advice. There is no one size fits all experience and that is just how life is. Take your time to learn about your experience and from it as well. If you are reading this as you begin, continue or anticipate your perinatal journey, I wish you a whole load of the best.

To find out more about my exciting perinatal journey you can check out my Youtube channel.

Also if you need someone to hold your hand along your perinatal journey you can always feel free to book a session.

You can also share about your perinatal journey experience in our comment section.